'If we’ve embraced pink as a reasonable choice for boys, maybe it’s time to also embrace it as a valid option for girls. Maybe I should make this the year I suck up my personal preferences, accept and celebrate that my daughter loves pink.' | CBCKids
Photo by @breejohnsonphoto via Twenty20Lately I’ve been posting old photos on Instagram. My daughter, Anna, as a toddler in a denim vest, in a firefighter helmet, in a fuzzy grey bear suit. As friends and acquaintances around me keep making babies — girl babies, in particular — I see similar photos posted: the tiny plaid shirts, the brown corduroy overalls, the space-themed sleepers. The implied “girls can be and wear anything they want” ever present.
Neither of us subscribe to the idea that some things are for boys and others for girls. But I wear lipstick and big earrings most days, and she wears pink. Is the battle against pink one worth fighting, when I otherwise believe children should have autonomy over these types of low-risk decisions? What message does my pushing away pink send to her, and is she rebelling by choosing pink at this point? Is there something implicitly anti-feminine in my approach here?
My social circle is largely populated by queer people, like myself, already on the margins of what is considered proper, and often judged for their outward presentation. More often than not, those of us who have kids in this community, regardless of gender, give a lot of options in terms of colour and style — not preferencing traditional masculinity over traditional femininity, and mixing things up and finding neutrals and alternatives as much as possible.
If we’ve embraced pink as a reasonable choice for boys, maybe it’s time to also embrace it as a valid option for girls. Maybe I should make this the year I suck up my personal preferences, accept and celebrate that my daughter has made a choice, at least for now, and loves pink.
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