SHOREWOOD, MN—Citing both having to work early the next morning and several other inconveniences presented by a recent party invitation, local swingers Doug and Tiffany Finsky told reporters Wednesday that there is no way they are driving all the way out to goddamn Oakdale.
According to the sexually adventurous couple, traveling to the event that their friends Linda and Joe Tremaine are hosting in the Minneapolis suburb over an hour’s drive from the Finskys’ home would likely not be worth the hassle, with the pair stating they would probably end up spending more time sitting in the car than they would at the party.
The couple went on to explain that they felt increasingly put out at having to always be the ones forced to make the trip to the bimonthly sex parties, saying that they couldn’t remember the last time the Tremaines had attended a similar gathering at the Finskys’ home. Though the couple said they generally enjoy such gatherings, their decision not to “schlep all the way out” to the eastern suburbs—which is reportedly twice as far away as the orgy they recently attended at a friend’s house in Eagan—was further cemented by news that certain of their closer friends in the Twin Cities’ kink community would not be in attendance.“If Diane and Will [Rappoport] aren’t going to be there, then what’s the point?” Tiffany said. “Those two are great.
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