Boyfriend doesn’t want to feel tied down, or to break up, or to consider any of his partner’s ideas for a compromise.
My boyfriend and I have been together for three years. I’m in my late 20s, he’s in his early 30s, neither of us wants children or cares about marriage. Before our relationship, he was very footloose. He can do his job from anywhere, and he shared an apartment with a cousin, so he was used to taking off whenever he felt like it.He recently let me know that he feels, especially after he moved in with me two years ago, that he’s no longer able to do what he wants when he wants.
I asked him what would make him happy, and he said he doesn’t know yet; he just wanted to tell me how he’s feeling so I’m aware and we could brainstorm together, but he doesn’t like any of the solutions I’ve offered. The conversation was left unresolved, and I’m worried his feelings will turn into resentment if we can’t come up with a solution.
You live your life as it suits you, and he lives his life as it suits him, and you enjoy each other’s occasional company and full-time contentment.This isn’t necessarily incompatible with the responsibilities of a house and pets. It just means they’re your house and your pets, and he contributes a mutually acceptable share of the upkeep — in cash or effort.Couples are happier when they do whatever works for them, mutually, onlookers be d---ed.
I sincerely hope I’m reading this wrong, but it looks like he’s shooting down any solution that involves him doing something in the hopes you’ll do it all for him so he can go off and do whatever, whenever he wants.Thanks for saying this. I called him Peter Pan a couple of times and backspaced, because they either find mutually agreeable terms or they don’t and that will settle it, regardless of what I think of anyone’s maturity.
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