Acknowledge that your inner critic is not your voice — it’s your anxiety, and it doesn’t always tell the truth.
A few years ago, I was in a therapy session, talking about how anxious I felt about bombing an important presentation at work. My therapist turned to me and said, “Why do you have to be so special at everything? Whoever told you that?” I looked at her and said, “I’ve always been special, since I was three years old.” To which my therapist replied, “Well, who says?”
The problem is that anxiety is not a sustainable motivator and perfectionism often causes procrastination. When the stakes of failing feel too high, we’re What does the saboteur in your head sound like? Maybe it says, “If you work hard enough, you can’t fail. So, work harder.” Maybe, like Newton’s voice, it says, “You’re lazy. Do better. People are depending on you.” Or maybe it tells you that your best is never good enough.
How do you feel right before the voice takes over? What emotions tend to precede it? For example, you might notice that you feel anxious right before your inner critic tells you to pull an all-nighter on a presentation. What’s making you anxious? What could help calm the anxiety in that moment?
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