Parents are bombarded with advice from the moment they share their pregnancies. Here's why it's detrimental.
, I looked down at my son's freshly-formed features, absorbing the curves of his chubby cheeks, tracing his cupid's bow, while suppressing the urge to nibble his dimpled knuckles as he drifted off to sleep. And yet, as I longed to stay completely in the moment, worry crept into the back of my mind.
Moms are bombarded with what they "should" do from the moment they share their pregnancy—even if the should doesn't align with their family values or expectations. In fact, I think I heard it all; you should bond with your baby immediately. You should exclusively breastfeed. You should get your baby on a schedule as soon as possible. You should. And then there were the things I "shouldn't" do; You shouldn't hold your baby too much.
Unfortunately for new parents, this pressure to do things "right" leads to doubting their instincts. "Should" feeds deep insecurity about self-worth. It's the reason why we compare ourselves to others. After all, shouldn't good moms want what's "best" for their babies?It's no wonder I was terrified of messing it all up.
, I was quickly forced to abandon "should" out of sheer necessity and self-preservation. And guess what? It all worked out just fine. I didn't miss "should" one bit. I discovered what worked for my family and learned to trust my gut about what felt right.
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