What Your Gynecologist Means When She Asks If You've Been Sexually Active

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What Your Gynecologist Means When She Asks If You've Been Sexually Active
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Times have changed, and so has our understanding of what constitutes “sex.”

balance, which can lead to things like bacterial vaginosis and yeast infections—not technically STIs, but a gyno’s domain nonetheless.

All that said, your doctor can’t test or treat you unless you offer a detailed, specific set of facts. Ideally, she’ll ask you lots of questions, and you’ll be as open as possible. “Historically, the way we were taught to ask was, ‘Are you sexually active, yes or no? With men, women or both?’” says Meera Shah, Chief Medical Officer of Planned Parenthood Hudson Peconic and fellow for Physicians for Reproductive Health. “But that’s not the way to ask anymore, because you’re not going to get all the information you need.”

Instead, Dr. Shah makes a point of getting down to brass tacks. She’ll ask, “What body parts are you using to have sex?” And: “Are you in a mutuallyrelationship?” And: “What genders are your sexual partners?” She’ll ask about oral sex and anal play, about fingers and shared sex toys. A lot of doctors, she says, don’t test for extra-genital chlamydia or gonorrhea—that is, when those STIs show up in places other than a penis or vagina. Not that Dr.

This all may sound scary and invasive, but chances are you’re perfectly fine, and you’re already ahead of the game by scheduling this exam. Overall, Shah says the key is to be “very upfront” on your first visit. You don’t have much control over what the doctor will ask, but you certainly can choose to be an open book.

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