'It was hard for me especially because my role had completely changed.'
My husband likes to joke that I retired young. And yes, technically I did leave my full-time career to transition into a. But the term"retirement" makes one think of a lifestyle blooming with the endless pursuit of relaxation and hobbies. And while at the time, I did feel that I was making the best decision for my family, I also began to question if I had made the best decision for myself.
. I knew I wanted to be home while my son was an infant, and I was grateful to be able to do that. I now refer to this point in my life as purgatory, because though I was home with my baby, I was still overwhelmed with work. I continued to work from home through the birth of my second baby, and that was when it became clear that I either had to return to work full-time or give up my job. I was overwhelmed. I felt that I wanted and needed to be with my children but I was hesitant to leave my job.
Sometimes I felt as if the world could end, and unless they announced it on Disney Junior, I would be completely unaware.I could understand my husband's resentment toward me: to him, I'm sure it seemed like I did nothing all day.go virtually unnoticed because you can't measure full bellies, perfectly calculated nap times, squeaky-clean rooms, or the brutal negotiations over eating, sleeping, and the potty, like you can in a typical 9-to-5. But it all takes a mental toll.
After realizing we were both feeling negatively toward one another, we hashed everything out in an honest and heated discussion. We realized we needed to. We both can tend toward snarky comments, which always ignites a battle of wits, but we learned that this isn't the way to voice our frustrations. We need to be honest, communicate our concerns in a respectful way, and share them in a timely manner, versus allowing bad feelings to develop into resentment.
I admit that I was not always comfortable in my role as a SAHM, but I have since learned to embrace it. I know that it's thankless and underappreciated at times, but I do find great reward in raising my children. I've come to realize that my tenure in this role is limited, as time will inevitably pull my children toward their own paths, and I'll be— which helped me realize what a special moment this is. During this short time, I get to see the world through my babies' eyes.
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