Have you heard about two people named Gwen Stefani and Blake Shelton, because I’ve never heard of them in my life. I’m joking—the Gwen Stefani/Blake Shelton Marriage Rumor Industrial Complex refuses to let me go about my day like a normal human being.
this narrative, and claimed in their November 18, 2019 issue that Gwen and Blake were still unmarried, and that he was refusing to propose.alleged that Blake had finally popped the question, claiming to have all the insider details on their pre-nuptials., unengaged, but “ready to wed” whenever. I’ll believe it when I see it!
But seriously, I don’t mean to sound obsessive—although I obviously am—but what exactly is the deal with these two? Do they... actually have fans? I assume that recovering rockabilly moms still dig Gwen’s music, and are also the prime audience demographic forBut besides that, who else? I’m genuinely scraping the barrel here in an attempt to understand their ability to move magazines. They did, however, move me to compose an obsessive, archival screed on their tabloid history in the last year.
, on that guy who pulled out and whispered, “Make out with my nose.” : “And then he pulled away and whispered, “Make out with my nose.” [Us Weekly], on trying bone marrow for the first time and loving it: “I tried bone marrow for the first time and love it.” [Life & Style], on healing and drinking water and minding your business: “I’m just healing and drinking water and minding my business.” [Us Weekly], on having a million lipsticks just for fun: “I have a million lipsticks just for fun.
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