A safe space for fuck ups or an emotional crutch?
Many of us share a complicated relationship with social media, negotiating digital spaces and the amount of ourselves we share online. Social platforms are how we find and form communities, how we build followings and even become brands. The positives of social media are ever expanding, and over the years the likes ofhave become a work portfolio, a forum for discussion, a tool for vetting potential dates, an archive, a method of sending blanket updates to those closest to you and more.
“It’s weird having loads of people seeing your stories but then only one or two people send you a message; it feels a bit like people are skipping past your life." For H*, a non-binary brown person, they want to be visible about their queerness online but struggled with how much of that they want to share. “I have old school friends who follow me on Instagram and I almost want them to see how I’ve changed,” they explain. “Like, ‘Hey, I wasn’t just a weirdo, I’m actually trans and queer!’ It’s nice to be able to show that off a little. But I don’t necessarily want them to see the most intimate moments of my life.
While Leo admits that she has some people on her finsta who she’s not particularly close to in real life, the fact that they’re following one another’s finsta accounts can create an unspoken trust pact. “I know you’re not going to share anything [that I say on my finsta] because I’m also seeing your inner dark thoughts. It’s not based on the closeness of friendship, it’s about whether they’re equally as messy as me.
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