'If we are to survive this epidemic, and keep our relationships intact under these strange new conditions, we need to re-examine the spaces in our homes and our hearts and create new boundaries to meet our current needs.'
Hello from England. As I write this from my home in Folkestone — a port town on the southeast coast — the lockdown is in full force. Pubs and restaurants, non-essential shops, businesses, and gyms are officially closed and gatherings of more than two people are strongly discouraged.
Staring out of a bedroom window into the hills and valleys that surround my home, I feel both grateful and afraid. To me, this place is a paradise that I’m lucky to share with a loving family and a dog who can run freely on the beach strewn with plenty of chewable driftwood!. It seems nowhere is safe from this invisible killer and we’ve been told to self-quarantine to slow the spread of the virus.
Wood, bricks, and insulation create walls that make rooms — a type of domestic boundary. Bedrooms for sleeping, reading, or meditating; a place for work and study; an area for cooking, eating, and gathering. Spaces support, accommodate, and enrichen our lives. They provide refuge and safety from the chaos looming outside.Relationships are no different.
Today’s circumstances are exceptional, and the fact is that we can’t protect our loved ones from our quirks — the ADHD attributes that are difficult to deal with in ordinary times, but bound to leave a bigger bruise now. There is no escape from my ADHD — for me or for them. Cheese is bound to be found in the bread bin; sharp, pointy knives dangerously exposed in the dishwasher; the house key left in the door… Friendly reminders need frequent repeating. Right now, my mind feels like it’s made up of broken glass. I’m struggling to take in all the important information coming at me. I fear the harmony in our home may be threatened.whenever possible, I’m reminded on a daily basis — especially now — of its shortcomings.
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