Be scared, be very scared.
It’s October, which means, unless you’re some sort of weirdo, you’re already on the hunt for some funny pumpkin carving ideas. It’s once again time to aggressively partake in all the ~spooky~ autumnal activities that you hope will drive away the 80 degree weather.
When it comes to carving pumpkins, you’ve got a few options. You could go basic with your Jack-o’, which might be a bit underwhelming, but would also be least likely to result in an embarrassing pumpkin failure your friends will mock you for. You could go skillful, but this isn’t really an option for me personally as it requires, you know, skill.
BUT. What if, instead, we got downright spooky with it? And not spooky like spiders and goblins, but spooky in the way that only ’90s kids understand? Ya know, crippling student debt, climate change crisis, applying for entry level jobs that require two doctorates and 30 years’ experience, that kind of thing. I would posit that 15 of the things Millennials go through before breakfast are spookier than a skeleton with, uh, a hook for a hand or a giant bat in a hockey mask, or whatever.
Let’s draw from all the horrifying things we specifically experience every day to really get into the spooky mood! Here are a few sources of our real-life, all-day horror show you could carve into your pumpkin this spooky szn to really strike fear into passersby. Maybe putting them on a gourd will make them less real? Fingers crossed.
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