What do our things say about us (and what do we want them to say)?
Cigarettes also sanctioned social withdrawal, associated most clearly with “taking a break” at work. “Going out to smoke” might be an excuse to end a current conversation . Among young adults, the activity might divide the more rebellious types from more moralistic or health-conscious ones. Beyond that, a lighted cigarette could be a line of defense, positioned between the smoker and an unwanted companion.
Setting these examples aside, most adults have some activity-linked object that serves both as focus and as social buffer. Televisions and computers are critical. Consider knitting and other forms of needlework, crosswords and number puzzles, magazines and books, musical instruments, and cameras. All make plain that the user has something “going on,” that they possess a certain interest or skill, and that other people should interrupt that user only with good cause.
What person does not possess treasured objects that link them to earlier life stages and to the people that shared those moments with them? Sometimes, these are simply records of what one has done . Others are public acknowledgments . Most poignant are products of loved ones who have moved on to other life stages or to death itself ., whether private or shared with others.
However easy or difficult those shifts may be, the issue is not so simple. Pointedly, by acquiring and using objects—that new cellphone, car, or pair of boots—wethe users of those items. Having worn social masks for most of our lifetime, we find that the face beneath is pale and malleable. Indeed, removing such masks for any length of time seems untenable. The person becomes the persona; essence and image overrun.
Stated more simply, material possessions claim us just as we claim them. Much of life, or so it seems, involves mortgages and car payments, shopping excursions, and visits to repair shops. Old goods are abandoned; new ones acquired. My concern is not to mark these activities as good or bad. It is to remind us that material things are more than tools, habitats, and conveyances; they are the circumstances of who we have been, are now, and will be.
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