The kids are alright — even without our help, thanks.
I am letting my 5-year-old dress himself. This means that he has to select his own clothes, stem to stern, take off the old ones, put them in the hamper, and don the new ones he’s selected, in the right order, without falling over. This would take me approximately two minutes.
It’s important that when kids are learning, we resist the urge to jump in and “help” all the time. That “help” often isn’t help at all; it’s hindering their learning. It’s not actuallyThink of a mom trying to get her kids out the door in the mornings. She’s not helping Junior learn to tie his shoes. She might give him two chances, then “help” because there is a schedule to be kept. It’s totally understandable.Imagine a kid learning to walk. We like to help kids learn to walk.
When we resist offering “help” all the time, we also offer very important, real help in another area — enabling children to learn their own limits. When we always swing kids over puddles, for example, they never learn how far they can jump. When we hover underneath, ready to catch them, there are never any real-world consequences to their testing their limits. If we always hold their hands while they balance, they never learn if they can balance on their own, and for how long.
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