My Rainbow Baby Was Born With a Rare ‘Birth Mark’ on His Brain and I Live in Fear Daily
. It was such an emotional time for us and we thought we were done having kids. I couldn’t bear it happening again. We had two healthy, thriving,Three years later, I had an overwhelming desire to have another, and my husband agreed.Little did we know, I was already pregnant! I was a nervous wreck my whole pregnancy. If you have ever lost a baby, you know exactly what I mean. The joy turns quickly into panic, anxiety, and fear.
There are literally no words I could possibly type here to explain the gut-wrenching heartache and pain I have experienced since Quinn’s diagnosis.I dug into every type of medical journal, article, and social media page I could find regarding this syndrome. At first, I could only focus on the bad. I dwelled on the worst case scenarios. I cried uncontrollably, multiple times a day, for roughly three months. I sank into depression, and I couldn’t pull myself out of it.
These treatments are so important for the health of the birthmark, and to help ensure the growths and thickening don’t happen.The earlier you treat, the higher the chance these results will be obtained. This was so hard on my mama heart, but I know it was the best decision we could make for him.My husband was away on a business trip a few states over, and Quinn had his first seizure. He woke up from a nap one day, screaming. I noticed he couldn’t sit up.
We were both loaded up into a helicopter. The 16-minute helicopter ride felt like an eternity. I was strapped into a seat, unable to move and tend to my son, who was now in the midst of another full-blown seizure. I was helpless and hysterical. I still am haunted by this vision, and I try really hard not to dwell on it.We landed and they unloaded us. My boy was still shaking uncontrollably, he wasn’t crying anymore because he physically couldn’t, and the silence was deafening.
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