Dear How to Do It: She says I’m not allowed to be mad about this.
You are right—there is not much more you can do besides accept that this is just the way things are. Notice that it is you, not your boyfriend, who is writing in for suggestions regarding how to bolster his libido. The words and action of his that you describe suggest he has come to terms with his disinterest in sex—he’s already talking about identifying as asexual.
“L” and I complement each other well in bed because she can be very dominant, sadistic even, and is also quite creative. We got heavily into roleplay right away, using the names of real people I know when talking dirty to me, bringing up real events I’ve told her about, and slipping into her “domme” persona out of the blue when we’rehaving sex. It’s definitely risqué, and she pushes my boundaries, but that’s also what I love about it.
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