Advice from Judith Martin, Nicholas Ivor Martin and Jacobina Martin.
: We have a relative whom we always invite when we host dinner parties, whether it’s for a holiday or just for fun. She always replies that she’d be happy to attend.
I personally feel insulted when I prepare a meal and she doesn’t eat it. I think she’s being rude to accept dinner invitations and then never eat the meal.Actually, your relative is being extremely polite in not making a fuss about her obvious -- to Miss Manners, anyway -- food restrictions. She said she had planned to host a baby shower in our neighborhood and invite her daughter, who lives nearby, to join us, but will not be able to due to some health risks. This information was provided via text to a large group of neighbors.
Further, the sex of this child is the same as the family’s first child, which should mean that many items could be used again. There was a huge shower for the other child a few years ago; does every baby need a new stroller and bathtub?The lovely and special gathering you have in mind is obviously not your neighbor’s purpose in having a shower.
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