Miss Manners: Elderly relatives are respectful of family member’s chosen pronouns, but sometimes slip

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Miss Manners: Elderly relatives are respectful of family member’s chosen pronouns, but sometimes slip
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We aren’t intentionally using the wrong ones, but it’s a process ...

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Thank you for addressing the issue of “intent to offend” as opposed to being slow to adapt to newly identified verbiage. The issue our family is experiencing relates to pronoun identity.

The issue: If we slip up and don’t correct ourselves immediately, the conversation becomes a battle. They will either aggressively correct the offender or refuse to respond, and the conversation is hijacked. The person is a minor, but their parent allows this aggressive approach to “prevent them from being disrespected.” What are your thoughts?

You say that you and your fellow elders are supportive but occasionally forgetful. Consider a similar situation, but without the emotional element associated with gender:“Sure, honeybunch. I’ll try to remember.”

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