I'm not really interested in being cheered up from a bad mood right now, and admitting that is pretty liberating.
Usually, when someone is trying to cheer me up, I try to let them. Or, at the very least, I express gratitude for the concern. But on this day, sitting in my bed, I said the first thing that came to mind: “I’m not overwhelmingly interested in being inspired right now.” Then I added a :::shrug::: emoji for good measure.
Before I explain why this was the best idea I’d had all week, I want to state the obvious: There’s immense value in finding ways to lift your mood andwhen they crop up right now. I’m not advocating for you to refuse help and commit to unhappiness indefinitely. But in the harsh light of the pandemic, platitudes like “everything will work out” might not provide the same comfort. A TED Talk on the science of happiness might feel like a pressure that you don’t need.
I can’t guarantee that this will be helpful for everyone. I also can’t guarantee that the person on the other end of your “no thanks” will take it in stride like my person did. But while it might sound dramatic to tell someone that you’re not interested in positivity at the moment, it was actually one of the kindest things I could’ve done for myself. I gave up the need to perform.
If you’re intrigued by this option but giving up on the pursuit of good cheer feels terrifying, or you’re a bit worried that you will slip into a deeper sadness if you try, you can give yourself a deadline. Put a pause on being coaxed into a better mood for a few hours or a few days. Or take a deep breath and tell the people in your life what youneed if cheerful book recommendations or nudges to “get outside” feel a little flat.
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