DearPrudie: “Am I stuck with him all summer?”
• Call the voicemail of the Dear Prudence podcast at 401-371-DEAR to hear your question answered on a future episode of the show.Due to the coronavirus, my organization has been completely overwhelmed trying to manage employee and strategic issues. The closure of day cares means that any employees with children are essentially doing two full-time jobs: watching children at home and fulfilling job responsibilities.
We’ve been open since the beginning of our relationship about our ideal family sizes and preferences on living environment. I feel like I sacrifice a lot for her , and she’s feeling like she sacrifices on bigger, more defining things .
If you and your wife need to revisit the question of where you live, there’s plenty of potential for compromise; if you two need to revisit the question of you returning to work at some point in the future so she can spend more time with the kids, there’s plenty of potential for compromise there too. But having a third child will only make those problems more glaring. I don’t mean to downplay or dismiss your wife’s desire for another child, but you already have two “perfect,” wanted, children.
Am I being unreasonable? We are a very tight family, and my heart literally hurts every time I think about them being there and me not being able to get to them if something goes down. I normally give them lots of space, but this feels different.I don’t think asking whether you’re being unreasonable is the right question. Your worry and anxiety make sense to me; your sons’ desire to maintain their independence even in times of crisis makes sense to me too.
Of course, it’s likely that crowded in-person gatherings are off the table for even your kissing kin in the immediate future, but this is a question not merely of physical but emotional proximity.This young person is being given a great opportunity to prove themselves and shine. In a crisis, people need to put all hands on deck, and chances like this, done well, are terrific learning opportunities professionally and personally, and they serve as chances for advancement.
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