things, but it seems we also excel at extending things, like loneliness, which experts believe millennials have extended well beyond its normal young adult duration, keeping loneliness alive well into
our thirties. Do they give participation ribbons for that? Because I would very much like one.to some of the 11 percent of millennials who report “always” feeling lonely, based on a study by YouGov that declared millennials the “Loneliest Generation” and found things that are a bit hard to believe, like one in five people ages 23-35 reporting having not one friend.
But Vice’s article did explore the modern paradox of being so constantly tethered to people via social media that we begin to feel disconnected from them in real life, citing UCLA researcher Letitia Anne Peplau as defining “loneliness as a distressing gulf between the amount of friends one wants and the amount that they actually have, a gap that young people—who feel pressured by social media and television to constantly be having fun and documenting it—feel especially acutely.
One twenty-something interviewed for the article described the feeling of sitting home on a Friday night and seeing endless photos of friends and acquaintances out having fun. I remember that feeling very well from being chemo-sick in my very early thirties and often home alone, watching friends’ Instagram stories and vacation pictures.
“The shallowness of her profession means that when she networks, she’s not trusting enough to make a real connection with her peers. “You have to be wary of the ones who want to use you,” she said. “‘I don’t like to be too close to anyone because people in this world use each other. They may want to be friends, sure, but they probably more likely just want to collaborate to get more followers.
Research about whether this millennial loneliness could be about to peter out for many of us is complicated. While previous studies have shown that loneliness tends to spike in early adulthood, then taper off in middle age and spike again for the elderly, new research around how dissatisfied millennials feel with their jobs and lives overall suggest that for elder millennials like myself, a new wave of John Cheever-ish loneliness could be still to come.
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