Dear Care and Feeding: My Daughter and Her Fiancé Are Rejecting My Post-Op Help

She’s my only child, and my heart breaks at the thought of not supporting her after her surgery.

people to do what we want them to do. I am so sorry to tell you that there isn’t, most of the time. We can try. But in the end we cannot change other people; we can only change the way we respond to them.

you I didn’t want to hear that.” Your stock response/change of subject/bafflement/joke will be sufficient to remind them of this—or it won’t. The main thing is that your own blood pressure will not rise. If you learn to shrug them off, their intrusiveness will cease to be a problem. In the immortal words of Taylor Swift: Shake it off.

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