Dear Abby advises a woman dealing with a demanding mother, a man who wants to cut out his ‘toxic’ brother, and a man navigating a bitter ex-wife.
I am a daughter who has spent 40 years helping out my parents. My father passed away seven years ago, and I miss him every day. My mother, whom I love very much, has become very needy, demanding and vocal in running all of our lives since Dad’s death. I’m at my wit’s end and don’t know what to do. My mother wants to be waited on hand and foot and has become very lazy. She’s 85 and has no major health issues.
Encourage her to become active with her church or to seek out volunteer opportunities, and guide her toward the nearest senior center where she can find companionship, commiseration and activities she may enjoy to fill her time. I wish you luck. You are all still in the midst of a transition, and they are rarely easy.My older brother is toxic. I want to cut ties with him because he has always criticized, antagonized, marginalized and dismissed me.
If I were ghosted, I’d want to know why and not be blindsided. But it’s pointless to engage or explain to him. He’s a lifelong bachelor with no children or significant other, so he has me in his will if he goes first. I would be physically ill to inherit his estate — home, car, funds and personal effects. I want nothing from him.
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