DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have two elementary-aged children. My mother occasionally babysits for us and freely volunteers to do so. If we sometimes hire sitters, she seems offended. However, she insists she must watch the children in our home, never hers.
While we appreciate her time, it would be lovely to drop the children off at her home occasionally rather than have to leave our house if we want a date night. I have made gentle suggestions, which she invariably declines. I should mention the condition of her home is borderline hoarder status. We have offered to sort things with her, and even hire a company to help her move anything she could part with.
When she babysits at our house, she sets a very early end time , then complains about how tired she is and gets a bit martyrish, although she has told me on many other occasions that she enjoys our kids and they are “easy” to watch. I can’t help but feel this issue might be resolved at her house. Am I unreasonable, or do you have other suggestions? -- DATE NIGHT IN MICHIGAN
P.S. Continue to press your mom about the issue of her hoarding, because it may be a symptom of a larger problem.DEAR ABBY: My partner, “Josh,” is a musician who insists on still practicing with the band even though he doesn’t have gigs. We have two fragile family members who would die if they got COVID-19, so we have tried to avoid any risks. Yet he still does band practice with people outside our household.
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