Clayton Talks Emotional Susie Split: I Had ‘Zero Energy to Fight' Any Longer

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Clayton Talks Emotional Susie Split: I Had ‘Zero Energy to Fight' Any Longer
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'It was this constant struggle and depression and it just wore us down,” Clayton Echard said of his split from Susie Evans. TheBachelor

“It was really, really complicated because we were pitted against each other. That was that night of the show where I lost my cool — which I still am embarrassed by to this day — when I lost my cool, it became Susie vs. Clayton. Not between her and I, but between the audience. Camp Susie vs. camp Clayton,” he explained,

referring to their breakup scene in which Clayton briefly wondered whether Susie was trying to be the next Bachelorette . “I was getting all the Camp Clayton people in my DMs telling me that she was wrong to do this, and then she was getting all the Camp Susie DMs. And so what it did was just validate our internal thoughts and beliefs. Now we’re butting heads because now we’re both like, ‘I got this many people saying this. You have this many people saying this. Who’s right? Who’s wrong?’ The fact of the matter was all that noise on the outside had no idea what was going on internally.

Clayton added that “you can’t heal when you are pitted against each other,” explaining: “It became, ‘I’m trying to heal. You are trying to heal. When I wake up and I’m happy [and] fine for one day, you are struggling. So now I’m sharing your pain.’ So it was this constant struggle and depression and it just wore us down.”

Their individual mental health struggles “absolutely just destroyed” their relationship, he explained. The“I didn’t want to get out of bed certain days. My days would start at 11:00 a.m. because I just didn’t want to get out and do stuff because I had no drive to live life. I remember just kind of looking at each other and thinking like, ‘We have to heal separately because we can’t take this any longer. I’m so destroyed. There’s nothing left. I have zero energy to fight this battle any longer.

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