A woman leaves a family dinner in tears after her mother repeatedly criticizes her smile. The author, struggling with chronic pain, feels her mother invalidates her experience.
Today’s Original Poster (OP) found herself in the same predicament when her mom decided to make it all about one thing— her smile. What should have been a fun time during the family vacation ended in tears as the OP decided she’d had enough. It’s one thing to receive an unsolicited comment once, it’s another to hear it repeatedly— so sometimes, you just have to leave the picture.
The author has struggled with chronic pain for the longest time and doesn’t necessarily get along great with her mother. At a family dinner, she posed for a picture with her husband and kids, but the author’s mother began to make comments about her smile being awful. Her mother did not relent on the comments, so the author decided she’d had enough and left the family gathering in angry tears. She felt bad for storming off and leaving her husband and kids, so she began to wonder if she was wrong for leaving angrily. With her husband, kids, and parents. However, she also provided some context by sharing that she and her mom have a weird dynamic, with her dad noting they are “like oil and water”. They were out for the first family dinner and the OP asked her father to take a picture of her with her husband and kids. As the family posed for the picture, but when she thought everything was fine, her mom spoke up, insisting that her smile was “horrible.” Rather than let the moment go, the mom made it worse, demonstrating how the OP’s face supposedly looked as if she was pulling her own face into exaggerated expressions. Her smile wasn’t perfect, but it wasn’t as bad as her mom made it seem. The OP’s frustration wasn’t just about the photo, though. It was the accumulation of years her mom had spent downplaying her pain. It isn’t small pain. It’s pain that has taken her career and energy. Yet her mom has constantly minimized the seriousness of the pain. After being criticized about her smile, she decided she didn’t want to be in the pictures anymore; however, that wasn’t the end
Chronic Pain Family Conflict Criticism Mothers And Daughters Emotional Distress
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