‘Being honest about parenting also means sharing the good stuff.’ Journalist RoseStokes and psychotherapist Anna Mathur joined us to share their tips about what to say (and what not to say) to expectant mothers. Read more here:
Does telling a mother-to-be about the realities of birth and parenting equip them with the information they need or just unnecessarily scare them?
“I was just inundated by this deluge of negative parenting experiences and birth horror stories I’d been told from friends and strangers since announcing my news. The sum of it all was having a negative impact on my mental health and making me feel very anxious about the task ahead. “Talking through trauma in the right context is therapeutic and helpful for the person who has been through it. However, secondary trauma can come to those who are vulnerable to the retelling – for example, hearing about a traumatic birth when pregnant. It can provoke anxiety and fear. When speaking to an expectant mother, rewind back to how you felt at that time. Think of what might bring her hope and comfort her instead.
“It is, of course, important that people are made aware of the challenges ahead. But being pregnant can be a tricky time for people, emotionally and physically, especially the first time round.”“I’m now officially halfway through my pregnancy and I’ve lost count of how many people have tried to put me off epidurals and c-sections, as well as telling me how important it is to breastfeed,” says Rose.