On dates my widowhood comes up early on. I always get teary when discussing the topic; it’s a wound that will never truly heal. But it’s not a great first-date opener.
Dear Lisi: I’m a young widow; my husband died in a car accident while skiing in the mountains. It was — and still is — an unbelievable tragedy, and it took me a long time be able to lead a somewhat normal everyday life. We had two children who were young when he died, but old enough to understand he was gone. It was hard on all of us.
I think you need to live your reality authentically. Your life experiences make you who you are, for good and for bad. Agreed, tears in the first half-hour of a first date ruin the vibe and the makeup, but it’s your story. I’m not suggesting you turn on the waterworks, I’m just saying, own it. My husband convinced me that I shouldn’t get involved and that this was a secret I should “take to my grave.” This has weighed on me for quite a while and I felt the need to unburden myself to my sisters, which has brought me some relief, but has unsettled them.
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