In today's Ask Amy, a parent asks for advice regarding children who 'can’t stand it if things are unfair.'
They can’t stand it if things are unfair. If one gets more than the other, it turns into World War III, and I jump into the middle to make things fair.For example, I will use a food scale to make sure they get exactly the same portion of any food I give them, and I make sure that they get the same number of gifts.
They have instead trained you to take extraordinary measures to appease them, and your efforts to give them a fairy-tale childhood have resulted in World War III. Not quite what you had in mind. Dear Amy: I am a woman with three young-adult children. They don’t know that my Dad is not my biological father.I knew my bio-father only in my early childhood.His last correspondence to me was a very nasty, vindictive letter accusing me of throwing him out like garbage.Do I need to tell them? I almost feel like it’s too late to tell them.Dear Conflicted: Yes, you do need to tell your children.
I see this as a redemptive story about love and acceptance. Your beloved Dad is still your dad. He is still their granddad. That does not change!
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