Advice by Carolyn Hax: Wife suspects her husband is gay, doesn’t want anyone to know.
I know my friends all suspect, and I worry about job security if he’s like this at work. I’m a stay-at-home mom and not leaving him, but I want him to stop being so obvious. How do I approach this?Those “touches and bumps” are inviting a harassment lawsuit or an assault charge, regardless of the sex of the people he’s bumping. It’s not about orientation or mannerisms; it’s about consent.
So please do that, ASAP — if you have the means to, which I know not everyone does. And either way, start formulating a financial Plan B for you and your kids. Do this even ASAPer, if that’s a thing, even if you’re certain you’ll never leave. I may be overreacting and you may be fine, but this situation has a whiff of ozone before a storm.
And: Tell your husband you’re uncomfortable with how touchy he’s become with others. Say you find it inappropriate. Say you fear his job is at risk, or worse.And … ugh. Tell him you are a real person with needs and feelings and a working BS meter and none of this is okay.Our group of friends switches turns eating dinner at one another’s homes. Four of the five couples eat most foods and one couple is vegan.
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