Before kids, I was mostly normal. Motherhood has made me weird.
Like, before kids, I was mostly normal. I didn’t worry about life, and I pretty much trusted things to work out. My biggest worry before kids was how I was going to fill my Thursday nights whenended . My husband and I did what we wanted, when we wanted, and save for the occasional financial mini-crisis or an epic hangover on a Sunday morning, life was pretty damn good.More specifically, I got weird about the strangest things.
I have a list of things that I can’t handle since kids, and I’m fairly certain it’s undeniable proof that motherhood actually makes women bonkers.Before I had kids, there wasn’t a baked good I wouldn’t sample. I was a big supporter and fan of bake sales and often patronized the church sale on Sundays.
Oh my god, what if he starts crying and I have a gun to my head and I can’t console him and he becomes motherless because the gunman shoots me for being a mom who forgets a binkie? So that day, I pretty much decided I’d never take my kids into a bank. Same goes for convenience stores. I only do drive up windows for my daily java because I’m afraid to take my kids inside a convenience store, which makes me caffeinated and whacky.My husband and I were on a trip and had the opportunity to learn to waterski.
So there you have it, a glimpse into my utterly neurotic thoughts since I’ve become a mother. And I know I’m not alone, so don’t even try to pretend you didn’t nod your head as you read my list of weirdness. Whether it’s freaked from zoo animals or worries about having to rescue your kid Jack Bauer-style in the subway, I think
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